Fearful Living 

To live in fear is to live in the hell of my own illustrations of what’s going on around me and In my mind. Do you think and think and think about a person or conversation or situation that hasn’t even happened? Do you worry about it? That is bringing up fear or living in fear and it is a habit. Once we begin to explain to our mind that it is fake, false and it doesn’t have to be that way. We can begin to release the false illustration we are putting out there in our world. 

Often our ego mind is what is the cause. Our own self hatred masquerading as self love, or our way is the best way (judgement) usually leads us down the path of fear, guilt of being on the defensive. Our ego makes our own suffering mean more than to live in joy each day. 

How do you get out of the illusion? First step is realizing it is all just a story we tell ourselves. The story is an illusion that we make up in our head. We can change our story at any time we wish. That’s what is so fun!! To change the outside of your little world you must first change your mindset. Living in fear will not bring you the results you want. Letting go of the fear will open so many new doors. Explore forgiveness, explore tools on letting go of past hurts, situations, and anger. Explore changing your self talk this is literally where it all starts. You tell yourself you can do something then you can and will. You tell yourself no one will buy from me, no one likes me, I’m broke, this is useless then guess what all that plus more will be your reality. 

Get your life back! Get on the path you want to be on. If you say I don’t know what to do next then you will be stuck. Get rid of the I don’t know how statements. Stuck = fear and limits. Just doing something means you are going down a different path and it starts the momentum to new things. Only way to do this wrongly is giving up or never starting. 

Today take action steps towards your dreams and goals. Action steps are talking to others, making those calls or seeing people. You know the ideas you had but never acted on them. Embrace each idea and apply action and follow through to those ideas. It is fun and the doors that open are endless. 

Much love to you

I’m possible 

Why not dream for the Impossible?! It’s really a trickery of words and eyesight. Impossible is really I am possible (minus the a) but you get it. It means anything you want to do, be or have is possible and worth going after!!! 

So stop, stopping yourself. Stop getting in your own way. Stop thinking it’s to hard or you can’t do it. Develop your faith and ambition and get after those goals. 

The only reason why you haven’t is because you limit yourself. It’s not about it being impossible it is about the limit or belief in yourself. For one day take that limit off temporarily, see how much you can get accomplished. Whether you brainstorm about ALL the possibilities, make a list, set your clock for 15 minute intervals and work as hard as you can for 15 minutes doing all the things you thought were difficult. Making those calls, emails, prospecting doing actual action steps not just writing down the steps. Doing the work. Pretty soon you will see the impossible IS very much possible once you decide to stop limiting yourself. 

Much love

 

Inside equals outside everytime 

January is the kickoff month for health and fitness traditionally. So many people begin this month off with the best intentions to take care of their bodies, wrote out goals and make menus. What I see so often they forget one key element to the success of sticking with this intention. 

Repeat after me: it all starts inside me. What’s going on inside me reflects or IS my world outside of me. 

Let that sink in for a moment. Let that process while I give you some examples. 

With this theory and statement I looked around me this morning. Usually you can see this in other people before seeing it in yourself. I thought about a family member this morning. He has piles of unfinished stuff everywhere. Piles of broken limbs in the yard, multiple places, piles inside the house and garage and really has a lot of unfinished projects and business in his life. 

Then I looked at myself, unorganized from the holidays, gifts waiting to be put away. My planner has been started but not finished. I feel behind and my surroundings of disorganization is showing it again. Although my projects are getting done each day I’m still putting myself and health on back burner. But everytime I put myself first I get so much more done. 

What is going on in your mind, self talk and self belief will make or break your goals and achieving them. Put your goals first, even if you have to make yourself do it, get up extra early (I dislike the 4:30am club but I get results on my goal list). That is how you will achieve your greatness. That is how you will make 2017 an epic year!! 

Go for it! 

Much love 

Make This Your Year. No Fear

I wish you the best in 2017.  May it be your best year ever! The most epic wins, the year you take chances that turn out amazing. The year you decide to make yourself first and learn to love you for you! Learn to love your flaws, perfectness and forgive yourself for the past. None of us are perfect human beings and learning the art of forgiving is what frees us. Live in the today, the moment not the past. 

Start the healthy lifestyle you know you should start. If your unhappy may this be the day, week, month and year you begin anew!!! 

If you want changes then change yourself so your surroundings change. Everything starts from within! Yes I use to really dislike that saying but it is so true. Find a mantra, make a declaration, hire a coach and learn new things!!! Raise your vibration and frequency. Read one good book a month, start a new routine. 

My new routine will be more water, more exercise, more meditation because honestly I am a zero in all three of these everyday. So I will start today (a little early) to begin my new habits. 

I made a new chart and uploaded an app to track my water and give me reminders. To help me hold myself accountable, so I can make these part of a daily routine without even thinking about it. So I can move to my next new set of habits. 

I dare you to crush new goals in 2017. Do not let another year pass you by. I don’t want you to sit there in December 2017 wondering what the crap. Why didn’t I go for it this past year. Where would I be if I did go for my goals. 

Pick goals that will push you. I love to pick goals that have multiple benefits. Such as a new exercise routine. One choice, one habit with multiple benefits!! Of course a new, healthy body, increase energy, pushing yourself Hardin exercise carries over into breaking barriers in life and goals. You see the results, you start crushing and achieving other goals on your list. 

Look at it this way. To change you have to start with your mindset, your head. You know those beliefs that like to hold you back. Change on the inside will bring about results on outside!!! I promise it does. 

Stop procrastinating and get after those goals!!! 

Minds Need A Break Too

The elf has returned to our house this holiday season. This was the day after Black Friday shopping. I had the elf sleep all day while others took gifts to santas workshop. 

Have you ever felt you needed a break? Sometimes we get so busy working, working out, running a ton of errands, doing for everyone else, school or maybe even owning your own business you wake up just tired and unmotivated. Ever felt this way? Ever looked around and everything around you is cluttered? Your car is cluttered and dirty. Your house has stuff everywhere. Your yard is overflowing with leaves. Just stuff is surrounding you every where you look. Know what time it is?? Time to de-clutter your Brain!! 

I suggest first is not going back to sleep. Instead get a pen and paper out and write out what is on your mind. Get it out of there to open up more space. Holding onto to-do lists, things we have to remember, worries just get it out on paper and you will begin to feel a little better. Then I say roll up your sleeves and start on a room or car. Clean out the clutter!! Get your surrounding organized and clean. Your surrounding are the best indicator of how your thoughts are running in your head. 

Than you can nap all day like Minnie the Elf 😊 

Much love to you all 

Changes on the Outside so You Feel Better

I gave the Elves some wallpaper this morning to help spruce up their livig space. 

I love this subject. Changing on the outside so you feel better on the inside… temporarily. 

How many time have you changed your hair color, makeup, clothes, moved furniture around, repainted rooms, bought new things? Changes bring more changes right? Yes it does and the universe is always changing that part is true. But how many times after you reprint, color your hair or new outfit do things go back to the way they were? 

This ephinamy or ah-ha moment came at a time in my life that I was just feeling lost. I felt deflated, like I was just floating through each day doing my normal everyday mom and wife duties. We had just moved into a new house. I repainted almost every room in our new beautiful home and I was in my new office. Removing the pretty blue color from my walls to a softer vanilla yellowish color. A stark contrast that was taking more than three coats of paint. As I was rolling on a new coat of paint I thought, it doesn’t matter how many things we change on the outside it’s inside that has to change first. It doesn’t matter how many coats of yellow paint I put on this wall, it’s still blue underneath until I put that primer coat one first. Primer coat would seal that color and not let it bleed through anymore. I thought that’s it!! That’s exactly what happens in our own lives. 

Our primer coat is our coat of change. Which happens on the inside not the outside!! So did that “fix” me that day. No, but it helped me explain it to many people I cared about going through things. 

Start on the inside. Start to clear and delete some of your old habits and stories. Begin to be aware of those nagging, pestering self talk tones you speak to yourself about and begin to think the opposite. My theory is be all in or don’t do it. If I lock myself on wanting a situation to change I better give it my all to really bring about what it is I want. No half assing it or you get half ass results. There is no perfect journey or perfect way of doing it. Just go for it. Start to ask what would it take for —- (this to appear in my life now)? For example, what would it take for me to feel more peaceful today? What would it take for me to have 3 new clients today? The answers sometimes come right away and sometimes you get clues on tv, radio or friends. The answer truly is action. When you get an idea or possible solution to your question act on it!! Sometimes those answers sound crazy but do it. Sometimes I get feelings or ideas to call someone or shoot them a text or message when I do I usually get the response I’m so happy your contacted me! Yes I want…. 

the point is if you want changes, lasting changes you have to change your inside way of thinking and habits before outside can truly change over a period of time. Sure it’s fun to have new hair color, clothes and things like that. That is all temporary, lasting is on the inside 😊

Much love

Pre Holiday Joy 

Our little Elves are starting to leave hints of their arrival soon. I will start early at our house to give you guys some ideas for this year. I put our Elf door out a couple weeks ago when I cleared off the bookshelf. I found it at Michael’s Craft Store. I added the felt Christmas tree the girls did last year and today I put up two Elf ornaments with each girls picture in it. 

What does this have to do with mindset? Positive lifestyle? Love? Lol it has everything to do with it. The magic of the season is upon us. This is absolutely my most favorite time of the year. It’s everything every self help person teaches to live in a gratitude state. To love even more and sometimes this season is easy to be able to get into this mindset. Then once season is over people kind of go back into their habits. Why? Why doesn’t it stick in that brain of ours? 

When we make a conscious effort to change. When we are aware we want to change our habits or our thoughts and beliefs we are more aware of the old habits we want to reprogram. An example, have you ever just winged something, you didn’t know what you were doing but you just kind of started it, felt it out and eventually you figured it out? Took a little longer didn’t it? Well think about you have been given instructions, step by step, you go after the end result and not as many mistakes are made. Focus, gratitude, love and hope can change lives, it can rock your world if you let it. 

For me doing Elf on the Shelf for the kids I am not only showing by example but I’m creating those neural pathways of hope, love, and teaching moments of gratitude for the little gifts. It’s all in how you look at it. I am a very busy mom, friend and successful businesswoman. I fit a lot in during my day and night. Did I fail with the Elf at first. Heck ya, I would wake up thinking crap I forgot to move that stinkin thing. But now I have reminders in my planner. Kids excitement to keep me going and above else the holiday feelings to want to make a positive impact on others around me. 

If you do have kids and do not have an elf you can do it with a stuffed animal or anything else that you want. The posssibilities are endless. Use my ideas or post your own in the comments. If you do not have kids take the nuggets out of the message of the blog and apply it each day. 

Start your gratitude journal today. Grateful November starts today. Name 5 things you are thankful for today. 

Much love 

Busting Through Pain of the Past

It is absolutely amazing how nature, inventions and our mind goes hand in hand.  Our brain has often been referred to as a complex computer system inside of our skull.  With millions of networks and pathways that carry on day to day activities, have us breath automatically, we talk to ourselves without even thinking twice about it, sense pain, danger and love, it is pretty incredible when you think about it.  Our brains are the most amazing organ in the universe when you think about all it can do.

When we bring up all our past hurts and pains we are creating a road for us to travel down all the time.  Think of it as a train track, and your mind is a car and when you begin to think those memories you are traveling down those tracks.  Sometimes we get so carried away our car gains speed and we can’t stop and before we know it we are completely immersed in the pain.  It is real, it is happening all over again and man we are suffering.  I use to suffer from anxiety or panic attacks, I would get myself going and it was difficult to stop.  I lived in the past for a long time, I let it consume me and I suffered.  I would relive a past pain, a wrong that someone did to me and I got hurt from it.  Why? Why in the world do we do this? It started with the actual experience, we got really upset from it and bam we started a new train track in our head.  We laid the rails, the wood and put a rail car on that track and we kept going down that track.  We kept going down it by reliving the story to all our friends, telling strangers about it, feeling the pain over and over and over.  It became part of our life story, intentionally or unintentionally it is now a path in our brain.  I began to tell myself I don’t want to keep reliving this, I don’t want all this pain drudged up over and over.  It’s not something I want to keep dwelling on, there has to be a way to heal and get past this.  Guess what! There is a way to heal and move on.  It just takes some motivation, dedication and focus for a little bit to get on a new train track.    I began to question the thoughts, beliefs and feelings I had daily.  I began to become aware of my feelings, and started to ask myself is it true? IS this stressful or negative thought really true? How can I know it is absolutely true? How do I react when I believe in this thought or feeling? Who would i be right now If I didn’t have this thought?

Let’s use my series of questions in a situation I coached a friend of mine through.  He would tell me all the time no one wants to marry a older man with young kids.  After hearing this same story a couple of different times I began to ask why he thought that statement was true.  His reply was I am in my late 40’s and have two young kids, no woman will want to take that on.  I said is that really a true statement? Can you look around and tell me you have never ever seen other older men get happily married to a great woman who loved him and his kids? Can you give me examples of famous people who have done this? Can you honestly tell me a statistic to back up this feeling you keep saying to yourself? Can you really honestly tell me no one ever in the history of the universe has ever gotten married later in life and lived happily with kids? He sat there and said I get the point, I am limiting myself and feeling sorry for myself so I have made up an excuse.  I asked how did it make him feel when he would say those words out loud to me and everyone else he was telling.  I know if you will tell me you have at least repeated it to yourself many times and possibly out loud to others.  He said it made him feel hopeless, like a failure and alone.  He didn’t want to believe it but he hadn’t found the right woman so he made that excuse up to make him feel better temporarily.  But it ended up being a rail car that railroaded him in finding love again in his life.  After this we worked on ways to bust through that excuse and make a new story for himself.  Happy to report he has begun dating again and is enjoying life in a new way.

Life doesn’t have to be so complicated, you can change.  You can change your brain and the thoughts you feed it at any time.  You can change your life story if you want to. To understand the brain, how it works and what our thoughts really are it can bring about some amazing results.

~Much love to you all

You Can Change!

I have studied and applied many self help techniques over my life.  I have studied this field since I was in high school (over 26 years) I can’t even think about that number right now.  But what I have been introduced to recently and I have dived into it not only for myself but for everyone around me is amazing…

See I truly believe God or the Universe will present to you information when you are ready for it.  For the next step because there is always a next step.  I am an expert on many different ways you can help yourself but there is always room for growth. Combine this expertness with science and I am one very happy little blonde.  So what happened? What have I been up to? I have been reading again, I have been applying new information (because that is truly the key step to anything) and I have been seeing changes.

What happened? I had a friend recommend a site to me on facebook, I checked it out, it was the John Assaraf page, if you haven’t checked it out please do so. He offers some great content and advice!! Then I went to the bookstore and a book literally jumped out at me. It is called Change Your Brain Change Your Life by Daniel Amen. While both of these people talk about your brain is absolutely able to change I love the science I learned about how and why this is possible because old school information is wrong. Let me take a story from the book real quick.  Daniel Amen talks about a 9 year old boy whose personality changed for the worse.  His personality changed in about a year and a half time period, from a sweet, loving kid to one that was suicidal and homicidal thoughts everyday.   I mean what the crap! He is 9 years old and so many people are quick to judge or dismiss and put someone on medication, which can make the problem much worse.  Up until this point there was no reason really why he was drawing pictures of himself hanging from a tree or shooting other kids. This doctor did not give up on him, he knew if he could take an image of his brain it would tell so much more as to what was going on with this child.  An MRI was ordered and performed on him and to everyone’s surprise his left temporal lobe was gone! What the crap! Left temporal lobe problems in the past studies have shown this part does have something to do with aggression in people.But why? There was a cyst about the size of a golf ball occupying the space where his lobe use to be.  If they wouldn’t have found the cyst it would have eaten its way into the bone and in six months he would have been deceased. At nine years old!

Ok so why does this book and Assaraf site make me happy? They both state you are not stuck with the brain you have. Science has proven we can change our brains and therefore change our lives for the better.  By providing new insights on how the brain works you can begin to see it differently and take the personal feelings out of your situation.  IF you can retrain your brain then you can make changes faster and simpler than before.  Each day I will blog about new information on how to do this and examples and proof it works with stories from other people who have tried it and had success.  Everyone is different, each body is a unique special operating system.  What works for one person may not work for the other one but applying a simple system into your thinking you can see changes.  This does not have to be complicated but it is work.  We will be challenging what is already wired in your brain but that can be a fun science experiment you do on yourself.

Education is still the best asset in the world. I highly recommend you research it for yourself and let me supplement your knowledge and training.

Much love to you all

 

Mindset 

It is crazy how much you sweat when the feels like temp is 104 degrees. Inside a sweat box of a gym it should be a sauna 😂 

Day three is in the books. Squats, lunges and Vertimax. I have always heard my husband state working out in here increases mental toughness. I can see why so many of our athletes look good out on the field in skill and endurance. It is a mindset to get through a workout in humid heat. I usually do workouts at home or in the mornings on these hot days. 

New habits require new routines and getting out of that comfort zone!! Like any new goal you have to do different in order to have different in life.