I am blogging today with a question I hope many of you can elaborate on. I have been throwing this question out to many people, some in the psychologists world and other victims and survivors of abuse. I started to question my therapist when I was in my late 20’s when I made the comment of “you know you are treating me like I had the catalog definition of sexual, emotional, and mental abuse. I don’t feel like mine is as serious as some others out there.”
I am not discounting because I was told I was in denial. Well to be in denial ya idiot means I am denying anything ever happened. And that I was not doing, I was trying to have an open, intellectual conversation wit an expert. I was trying to ask her and many others if there could be like groups of types of abuse. Take for example, when someone says I was sexually abused. Usually the default thought is “oh my goodness you poor thing you were raped as a child and by who?” That is such a broad spectrum covered under that one word. The same can go for physical abuse, “oh my goodness you were beaten with broken bones?” I have met and talked to many victims and survivors and trust me when I tell you those words don’t describe some of what they have lived through!!
The word abuse doesn’t even do what they went through justice. But despite what we each have gone through we all have a common bond or feeling that is almost identical no matter the level of abuse that occurred. For myself I find my experience on the lower end of the spectrum. I wasn’t raped, I wasn’t used to for animal rituals, I wasn’t tied down or up, there are so many scenarios here that have happened to many people.
Have anyone else ever felt that maybe in this hush-hush world of abuse that maybe it needs to be revamped a little with descriptions? I understand that if you have been touched or kissed in any appropriate way that is it sexual abuse. I am not lessening anyones experience here. And usually new ideas shake people up and strong reactions occur. I am trying to open this secret world of survivors and victims and encourage them to talk and get some of their feelings out. I am a firm believer that you can heal and lead a happy, productive life.
My book that has just been released does just that. My intent is to wake us up and look at what we endured as a strength and not something to hide from anymore! http://www.whispersfrommyheart.weebly.com